When I first came across mediation, I immediately thought the concept was one that people would surely consider before going through the courts. However, I soon found that the demand (although growing) is less than the need. The need is there as the Family Courts are overwhelmed with cases and if more people looked for a mediator before a solicitor, maybe this wouldn’t be the case.

A step forward…

In April 2014, the law changed and people are now required to attend an initial mediation session to explore if mediation could work for their situation. The pressure from courts to attend mediation works as a benefit for most. However, for some it’s an additional step in the court process that they would rather avoid. Mediation is and should always be voluntary and if someone is not invested to resolve the conflict, it will never happen. Even if it does, it most probably will not stick.

Finding a mediator…

Most people generally understand what a mediator does. However, finding a good mediator can sometimes be a challenge, as the industry is not regulated like some other professions. It’s important to trust and be transparent with your mediator. If you are looking for a mediator, always make sure they are registered with the Family Mediation Council (FMC). For information on family mediation and contact details for qualified family mediators in your area, please visit www.familymediationcouncil.org.uk

Do your research…

Mediators have different styles and it’s important to find someone who you feel comfortable with and have a good feeling about. Take the time to talk to them on the phone and do your research. In mediation, understanding people’s personal experience of the situation is often just as important as understanding what the issues are. More often than not, conflict arises because of misunderstanding and differing interpretations. In order for the mediator to help mend the communication breakdown, it’s important you feel at ease and are happy with their style of mediating.

Getting a fair deal…

Some people may feel they need to protect themselves and their own interests and that going through the litigation process is the only way they can do this. Others may fear that they won’t get a fair deal and they may not be able to get their perspective heard. However, sometimes mediation is the only way to get the other side to listen and for you to explain your side.  As a mediator, I can only reassure you that it is my role to ensure fairness.