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Expectations are everything

Expectations are everything

As with every new year that passes, we tend to reflect on what we have achieved, set ourselves goals and have expectations for the year ahead. We all have expectations, some bigger than others. Why do they matter? How can they cause conflict? And what you can do to manage them? Think about a time where you expected a journey...Read More
The coin toss

The coin toss

There are many crises happening all over the world and this year we have experienced one closer to home. The Coronavirus crisis has had life changing impacts on families and peoples livelihoods. These impacts have been through no fault of their own and has often been determined by good fortune or bad luck – a coin toss depending on where...Read More
Unpacking forgiveness

Unpacking forgiveness

Recently, I have been thinking about forgiveness and its place in mediation and resolving issues. I have to admit, it’s not a word I would or even could use with my clients. Deciding to forgive is a very personal decision. Initially, when people come to mediation, they are in a difficult place where they often can’t communicate directly with each...Read More
Perspective can be powerful

Perspective can be powerful

Perspective can be powerful. When we come across an idea or behaviour we don’t agree with, our initial reaction can often be negative. However, these negative emotions fade away when we reflect on the situation and take time to consider it from a different perspective. But how can we use perspective to resolve conflict? There were five blindfolded people standing...Read More

Separating…what next?

If you are sure that your marriage has ended and there is no chance for reconciliation, you will need to follow the divorce procedure to obtain a decree absolute. You can find more information about the divorce process here https://www.gov.uk/divorce If both parties agree to the divorce and the reasons why, getting a divorce legally finalised should take approximately 6...Read More
Tolerance can stop a war

Tolerance can stop a war

What is your threshold for tolerance? There is poem from ancient India called the Mahabharat. If you are familiar with the Mahabharat, you will know that it has influenced Indian thought for centuries and much has been learnt from it. The Mahabharat is about a war between brothers; a war that started when one brother, Duryodhana’s, pride was hurt. His...Read More

Alternative dispute resolution (ADR) or court?

There is no simple answer and a lot will depend on your priorities, circumstances and what you want to achieve at the end of the process. What is ADR? You could google it and get an answer, but it may also confuse you due to the vast range of terms used under the same banner. Imagine these two situations: The...Read More

Why mediation?

When I first came across mediation, I immediately thought the concept was one that people would surely consider before going through the courts. However, I soon found that the demand (although growing) is less than the need. The need is there as the Family Courts are overwhelmed with cases and if more people looked for a mediator before a solicitor,...Read More